“There is nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.”
William Shakespeare
Guidance and support on life's journey
Suffering from anxiety
or depression?
Looking for meaning in life?
Spiritual philosophical coaching
Online treatments
Spiritual philosophical coaching
I am a CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy) therapist and mindfulness instructor who offers spiritual and emotional help and support in dealing with difficulties that some of us have in our lives. I offer my help on a "dana" basis as is customary in the Buddhist tradition - without a set fee - according to the generosity of the heart - according to your desire and financial ability. There is a second option for my support for people who are having a hard time, and who have an attraction to the spiritual world and a curiosity to enrich their lives with meaning, and add spirituality to their lives - an option that is not aimed at long-term support, but rather at guiding and training you to develop the ability to "take care" of yourself - without external help: a series of mindfulness training sessions that also combines training in Buddhist meditation (without combining with CBT) - a series of sessions that will prepare you to introduce mindfulness into your life.
Who is this relevant for?
I offer spiritual philosophical coaching based on mindfulness that helps in dealing with emotional difficulties, enriching the experience of life, and finding meaning in our existence. Online or in-clinic treatments in Hod Hasharon Most people who are feeling unwell - and who are having a hard time - suffer because of a wrong (sometimes distorted) view of life/the world and themselves. They have developed a negative view of what the world has to offer us, and they attack themselves with great force - emptying themselves of value - feeling unworthy of love and incapable of succeeding in life and being happy.
Then emotional phenomena develop in them such as:
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depression
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anxiety
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Poor self-image
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A sense of meaninglessness in their lives
The suffering/unrest we experience is less because of what is happening in the reality of our lives, and more because of our clinging to reality and our resistance to what is and our insistence that reality be different.
Our unhelpful response to our encounter with reality stems from unhelpful mental habits that we have developed and which are not easy to change. Mindfulness is very helpful in this.
Whenever we recognize suffering within ourselves, it would be very helpful for us to make an effort to try to see/discover what we are resisting, and what we are not willing to accept.
And this is not just about an intense experience of suffering, with clear anxieties and/or depression, but also about "just" unease/lack of joy in life and a bit of a feeling of boredom.
The source of human suffering is the disconnection of some of us from our deepest essence, the loss of connection with who we are at our core, and with the beauty – love – the wonder that surrounds us, and as a result, an addiction is created within us to pleasures and objects that we perceive will bring us happiness – without which we will never experience it. Suffering fundamentally stems from an error in our worldview. Attributing excessive importance to certain achievements and objects, which seem to us to be the only way to achieve happiness, and also as essential – absolutely - for us and everyone around us to recognize our worth.
One of the main insights in Eastern traditions is that human suffering is the result of a wrong view of reality. Such as:
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A mistaken view of who we are and what our deepest essence is.
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Arguing with reality. Lack of acceptance of what is happening in our lives.
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Bad false stories about us and our world, which our mind creates
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Blindness/forgetfulness within us that leads to ignoring the wonder of all the beauty, mystery, and love present in our lives
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We have a profound lack of understanding of what makes us valuable. In understanding the source of human value. We mistakenly think that value is created by our achievements, accumulation of property, and successes.
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The main error in our vision is not in this or that specific incorrect thought about what is required of us, but in the very approach to things through thinking. Because our mind is very limited in its perception of reality. Instead of analytical and conceptual thinking, it would be better for us to enter the silence within ourselves, to move from thinking to observation where the wisdom of our heart is. Our mind (thinking) has developed and acquired great skill in countless areas: building bridges, producing an atomic bomb, launching spaceships to the moon, and more. But discovering the truth about our lives and finding the right way to live are not in the mind's area of expertise.
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We must not believe our mind! It is usually wrong! Our mind tends to create terrible stories about the world and about ourselves, which arouse a lot of suffering within us. Instead of thinking, it is better to choose quiet contemplation - meditative and not conceptual.
In understanding the nature of the process that leads to this suffering, there is something very optimistic, because if suffering is created, not by "bad luck"/not by decree/punishment from the gods, and not because we are irreparably "defective", but because of a disruption within our consciousness in the perception of reality, this also means that there is a possibility of correction. If we locate the disruptions that have been created within us, and that have created the suffering – and if we open within ourselves a correct perception of reality and of ourselves – the suffering will also disappear.
What is required of us is also to pay attention to the distortions of our thinking – to the ways in which our mind attacks us and presents us to ourselves in a distorted way that drains us of value and shows us ourselves in a very negative light. It is required for us to pay attention not only to the content of consciousness, but also to notice that the “lenses” through which we view ourselves and the world are the source of our suffering.
We have the ability to clear our lenses – we have the ability to calm and stabilize our minds - through mindfulness training in meditation. Then we can begin to see things clearly.
Insights from Buddhism that support liberation from suffering and calming the mind:
The illusory nature of the "I" and the view of conditioned becoming that shapes the entire unfolding of what happens in our lives.
When the "delusion" ends - the end of suffering also comes and with it the clinging within us ceases.
At the basis of this view, suffering is seen as the result of not having reached the true and liberating view.
The goal is not “just” to achieve pleasantness in our lives without suffering, but rather liberation from the delusion/wrong view that creates suffering. And as a blessed byproduct of this – we begin to experience inner peace.
Mindfulness has several aspects and ways of contributing to our lives:
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There is a contribution and benefit on a psychological level from our more beneficial connection to reality and the reduction of the ego within us.
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Mindfulness greatly contributes to strengthening/increasing our presence in consciousness. Because in our natural/common state we "fall asleep" again and again and forget the abundance/beauty/and grace that exists in our lives.
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A shift in frequencies from thinking to observing. Then it is possible for us to see reality as it is, without the illusion of thinking distorted by fears and desires.
The Dharma essentially claims that the only way to end suffering/unrest is through spiritual liberation.
Only entering into a connection with the unborn - with the essence of existence - with the transcendent - allows the cessation of the craving and thirst that it produces in us, and which we try uncontrollably to satisfy through the senses, through the pursuit of pleasures as substitutes and as a means of satisfying the emotional hunger within us. And this will never really work - and therefore we will always suffer. There will always be restlessness within us. And the path to liberation is possible through extensive practice of meditation combined with deep reflections on the fundamental insights of Buddhism: on the nature of the "self" and on "conditioned becoming."
What is special, different, and attractive about what I offer?
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I offer my help on a "dana" basis as is customary in the Buddhist tradition - according to the generosity of the heart - without a nominal fee - according to your desire and financial ability - and what feels "right" to you.
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I combine C. B. T. (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) with mindfulness, and this is a very effective combination for those of you who both want to eliminate suffering from your lives, and are also looking to add meaning to your lives, thereby finding more joy in them.
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I allow my patients access to spiritual traditions - both Eastern traditions - and Jewish traditions - which have the benefit of wisdom and the richness of a benevolent worldview.
About Shmulik Hochman
My name is Shmulik Hochman. I live in Israel, which is also where my clinic is located.
However, most of my meetings with patients take place on Zoom.
I am a spiritual philosophical guide and a cognitive behavioral therapist.
I previously studied C.B.T., a treatment method that is highly effective and proven to reduce depression and anxiety, and I spent many years studying mindfulness and delving into various spiritual traditions: mainly Eastern traditions (Buddhism and Hinduism) but also Jewish spirituality/mysticism (Chasidism).
I myself know from personal experience, existential difficulties of the kind that I seek to help my patients deal with, and it seems to me that in my own personal struggles, I have learned lessons that may assist me in providing help to my students and patients.
What drives me is the desire to minimize human suffering, increase joy, and also teach people to see life in a more correct way. Because that is what allows for beauty/joy and love in our lives.
I had many years of living with a wrong view which greatly harmed my life experience. At some point I "woke up" from this bad dream. Now, one of my main goals is to share with others the lessons I have learned.
My life experience has shown me that even more than the therapist's knowledge and content worlds help patients who are having a hard time in life find strength within themselves and develop joy in their lives, what matters even more is the human connection between the therapist and the patient.
This connection - when it is created - is like a miracle that can bring about healing and growth.
The working method/what do I offer? The process I work with has 2 parts:
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Learning: Identifying and recognizing the perceptions that create incorrect views that bring suffering into our lives, and becoming aware of the alternative insights that liberate, as well as learning and practicing meditation, which is a form of observation that involves more quiet awareness and less analytical/conceptual thinking.
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Practice/Application: Addressing the specific places that hurt you – and practicing the vision of understanding that dissolves pain and liberates.
The first part requires 3-5 sessions. The second part, depending on the case, is a personal matter which differs from one patient to another.
Meditation is of central importance in mindfulness in general and in my work method in particular. There are many aspects and explanations for this that we will discuss if you come to me for study and treatment, but the main aspect lies in the understanding that most of the conscious/human suffering is created by thinking. Especially analytical and conceptual thinking. And even more so when thinking becomes repetitive and compulsive. Meditation is the medicine that frees us from this.
What is unique about mindfulness and Buddhism is that human suffering and emotional pain are not perceived here as the result of childhood events or bad luck. Rather, they are the result of a wrong view of reality. And there is something very optimistic about this. – Because it means that the causes of suffering can be corrected – we can cultivate a correct and beneficial view of reality, and then the suffering will fade away and cease. This is what Buddhism is about – teaching how to see things in a balanced way – and this is how I also intend to engage in the process with you – searching for a correct and beneficial view of reality – one that will bring about liberation from pain and increase joy/love and beauty. If we understand that our suffering is “our own doing” – the result of seeing things wrongly that we create – it also means that it is in our power to correct the wrong view – and eliminate the suffering. And this is the focus and purpose of the mindfulness therapeutic process.